New Break up, New Blog

New Break up, New Blog

The clue is in the title – yep, another boyfriend bites the dust, and even though I had been the one to end it I still found myself thinking about him all the time. Obsessing how we could have made it work and how we could have done things differently. He was my waking thought that would carry on throughout the day like an addiction. My mind habitually replayed the relationship, over and over; searching for any comfort from the painful feeling of loss and separation ……and then came the chocolate. Chocolate isn’t usually my thing, I can take it or leave it but wow when I was feeling very tired and alone the day after being maid of honor at a wedding with out my plus one I worked my way through a whole box of celebrations followed by a tub of chocolate ice cream the next night and so it would have gone on had I not copped on and took control of my mind. I needed to stop this cycle, break the addiction of my thoughts and my cravings.

In Chinese Medicine, overthinking really weakens the spleen and never really helps or changes the situation. The flavor for spleen is sweet, so when we get into uncomfortable situations or when our mind chews and chews on a topic we often crave the comfort that comes from sweet flavours. An easy, instant, sugar hit is chocolate. It gives the mind temporary relief but in the long run creates sugar lows and further obsessive thinking. Energetically the spleen is responsible for satisfaction and its flip side, addiction: easy to see how sweet flavours create addictive patterns both physically and mentally in Chinese Medicine

What can help is reaching for a better feeling or thought. So park the problem, tell your mind you are not going to think about it until 6 o’clock and then you are going to only think about it – in fact you are going to write about it – write all about it and then throw the paper in the bin at 7 o’clock, but until then do something to make yourself feel better, bake some bread, sing along to your favourite songs at the top of your voice, call a friend, read a good book, go for a run, look at the clouds and just give your overthinking mind a breather, help your body and mind relax, this in itself improves any situation.

So what did I do? All of the above plus made a few batches of the Raw Cacao Balls. Because the raw cacao bean has been fermented rather than roasted, this form of chocolate is actually good for the body. In its raw state, the antioxidants in cacao can be 20 times more powerful than blueberries. When dairy and sugar are added to cacao unfortunately the antioxidant properties of this food are blocked. Also raw cacao is super at releasing the happy hormone, serotonin within the brain, bringing on that satisfied feeling without the aid of a sugar high. These tasty treats are simple to make and keep well in the fridge. They are perfect if you feel like comfort eating. If the lover that you love is not behaving how you would like, if you constantly replay conversations to see if things could have gone better, its time to stop chewing things over, its time to stop ruminating, deliberating and contemplating; Its time to start creating with Cacao.

Cacao Treats

  • 2 tablespoons ground pumpkin seeds
  • 1 teaspoon chia seeds
  • 5 tablespoons ground almonds
  • 2 tablespoons raw cacao powder – raw
  • 1 tablespoon maple syrup (or alternative)
  • ½ teaspoon vanilla extract


  • Tahini/ peanut butter/ honey
  • Dates/ cranberries
  • Raisins soaked in apple or orange juice
  • Coconut oil

In a food processor blend all the ingredients in the order above. When the seeds are ground and everything looks powdery use a teaspoon to scoop out the mixture, squeeze and roll into small balls using your fingers and the palm of your hand. This can be messy so wear latex gloves if you like as they stop the mixture sticking too much. Put them in a Tupperware in the fridge for an hour or so to harden and chill. I have no idea how long they last as myself, visitors, neighbours, children eat them all pretty quickly. They make great gifts too – who doesn’t love healthy chocolate.